Growing up, I was always proud of myself for not having any allergies. Peanuts? Love 'em. Shellfish? Can't get enough of the stuff. Dust and dander? Bring it on. Shit, I'm not even allergic to poison ivy. This was always surprising considering the myriad of health problems I am constantly suffering from. The running joke is that my body is constantly finding new, unique and, frankly, unexplainable ways to sabotage itself. Except it's not really a joke and it's definitely not funny.
My first unusual allergy surfaced when I was a teenager. Because I had horrible parents who hated me and refused to put in a pool for their flawless, fantastic children who truly deserved the best of everything, I spent a majority of my summers at my aunt's house. Who actually loved her children (and nieces and nephews and grandchildren) and therefore had a pool. I would spend my days alternating between sunning myself on the deck and having underwater tea parties with myself. (I was an odd child.) And then one day, while I was battling an inflatable Shamu, I felt it. My stomach and legs started to itch and burn like crazy. I thought I was just a bit cold from being in the pool for too long, but unfortunately I emerged from the water to find myself covered in red, bumpy, itchy hives. I looked like some hideous, malformed sea creature.
At first it was attributed to the chlorine, but a trip to the beach confirmed that it wasn't just a sensitivity to chlorination.
I was a medical mystery and avoided all bodies of water for the next few years. But it took a particularly cold, blustery day to obtain a diagnosis. I was walking to class and had not properly bundled myself for the frigid weather. By the time I reached the classroom my hands and neck were red, itchy and covered in hives. Between this and my unfortunate experiences with any non-heated bodies of water my doctor finally diagnosed me with cold urticaria. Yep, that's right. I'm literally allergic to the cold.
Although for some people it can be life-threatening; my case is (thankfully) mild and annoying at best. I gravitate toward heated pools and dig my toes into the sand when on vacation. And now that we are heading into the colder months here in New York I bundle up more than a normal person would and dream of moving to warmer climates.
Stay tuned to hear about some more unusual, but always entertaining, allergies.
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